Friday, January 20, 2012

A Gaggle of Tweens

"I just thought I'd warn you, there is a gaggle of tweens headed this way."  -my bff Laura-

How do you know when you've spotted a gaggle of tweens?  Well, lucky for you, Laura and I defined all of this just tonight. 

A gaggle of tweens is three or more 11-13 year olds who are unsupervised, in public.  Dun dun duuuunnnn.  An official "gaggle", as defined by many online dictionaries and wikipedia, is five or more [geese], however, when it comes to tweens a gaggle equals three.

Like a gaggle of geese, tweens are known to slowly waddle walk on sidewalks and down the center of roads, hallways, and parking garages with no regard for your need to get by.  Gaggles of tweens are often noisy or disorderly making it difficult to enjoy yourself sans their incessant honking  talking/giggling. They are also known to hiss at you randomly (yes, both tweens and geese).  Even with a leader, both types of gaggles wander aimlessly, loudly and slowly.

I tried to snap a picture of a gaggle of tweens at the movie theatre tonight, inconspicuously, but then I realized as they sneered at me, that they invented the art of secretly taking pictures with an iPhone.  I could hear their tweeny minds thinking, "Who is that creepy old lady trying to take a picture of us while pretending she's not taking a picture?"  And to them I would say, "27 is NOT old!  And also, could you help me get back to the home screen?" 

Gaggles of tweens have changed since my day.  Back in the day tweens were consistently and consecutively louder and more obnoxious.  Today's gaggles of tweens often speak to one another via text message so there are longer bouts of silence.  It's always a strain on the senses when they start honking again after having enjoyed a few minutes of peace!


  1. Comments from Facebook:
    Amy M: Bahahahahahah!!!!!

    Sadi C: Hahahahahahah. Nice. Good definition. :)

    Luke& Jennifer: A gaggle of giggling girls grabbing green grapes

    Janice W: A belly laugher!!!