Thursday, June 7, 2012

I'm So Tired

I'm too tired to think of a catchy blog title so I decided to be matter-of-fact.  I'm so tired.

There are different kinds of "so tired".  Quite possibly, I am the only person who breaks down being tired into different categories but I would be very interested to know if you do the same or if you have your own categories. The main types of tired are:  Angry Tired, Weepy Tired, Whatever Tired, and Crazy Tired.

The worst kind of tired is the Angry Tired.  Angry Tired is caused by absolutely no sleep, too much activity during the day that you can't say no to (you know, like work and breathing), and knowing that you won't be sleeping anytime soon.  You can't even lay comfortably in bed at night.  Coffee doesn't help at all.  When one experiences Angry Tired they have murderous thoughts toward family, friends, co-workers and small children for minor offenses such as existing. When someone invites you out to do something fun, your first internal reaction is, "How DARE they even think I would want to watch a movie?!  Grrrraaaaghhhhh!"  Then, you turn green and explode up into a muscular rage filled monster and start smashing. . .wait, I'm sorry that's the Hulk.  Basically, you turn into the Hulk.

 Fortunately, I am not experiencing the Angry Tired right now.

Another type of Tired is the Weepy Tired.  The Weepy Tired often results in the need to watch sad movies before crashing into a comatose sleep.  Weepy Tired may or may not be hormone related.  I haven't done enough research.  Basically, though, one cannot finally sleep without a good cry, for no apparent reason (*cough* hormones).  It's the easiest to deal with of all the Tireds.

Of course, we can't forget just plain exhaustion.  Exhaustion doesn't really have an emotion to it.  It goes way past Angry and Weepy tired into a realm of indifference.  It's the Whatever Tired.  You know you aren't going to sleep anytime soon or that if you do sleep it won't be restful. Being mad or sad about being tired is too tiring so you just live in a fog of perpetual indifference.  Whatever.  This, sadly, is the state of tired I find myself in the most often.  "Yeah?  So I haven't slept. mlllleeehhhhh."

Presently, I'm experiencing Crazy Tired.  Crazy is used two ways here.  First, it's a figure of speech and means I'm really, really (or crazy) tired.  Secondly, being tired is basically making me crazy.  Crazy Tired is sort of euphoric.  It's the "happiest" of the Tireds because you have the ability to nap or to go into coma-like sleep at night, so you look forward to those times instead of resenting them.  Coffee helps throughout the day and you have hope that soon, very soon, you won't be so tired.

Here's where the crazy comes in: Objects and people begin resembling fluffy, white, down comforters and pillows.  I start to feel convinced that it would be totally appropriate to curl up on my office desk and nap.  Right?  I look at the stacks of resumes, the business card samples, the project plans, industry magazines, certification coursework, workflows and maps, and determine that it all looks strangely comfortable.  I could climb up there, turn around three times and curl up like a cat and nap on all that stuff.

Maybe Crazy Tired should be renamed to Feline Tired?  Ultimately, you mirror the behavior of a cat.

Anyway, that's what I am.  I'm Crazy Tired.  I have happy daydreams about snuggling into soft bedding or thick, green, warm grass in the middle of a field.  I have bursts of goofiness throughout the day, and random urges to sleep in inappropriate places.  The nice aspect of Crazy Tired is that I still have the drive and ability to push through and function although it's usually only because I know that as soon as my tasks are complete and the day is over, my reward is sleep!

Anybody else out there tired?



2 comments:

  1. whew, that's a lot of tired! :D Yes, I break tired down into different categories as well - as a mama I definitely relate to Exhaustion at times and to Crazy Tired quite a bit!

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  2. Great post! I think everyone has different forms of tired.

    For Exhaustion tired, I think you might have to add that exhaustion might be mental or emotional, too, not just physical. Sometimes there is just too much to one day - too much many projects or too many emotional highs and lows.

    Also, I have to add my favorite: Hallucination Tired. Over the course of my typical work days, I never even remotely come close to this form of tired. However, the nature of my work sometimes demands work sessions that excessively long and mentally exhausting. After too many hours of my mind working in overdrive, my mind begins to route information inappropriately. The hallucinations begin as auditory - I hear things that actually didn't happen. For instance, I might hear my cell phone ringing but the screen is dark and looking further still there is no history of a call. However, if I keep pushing myself in mental overdrive the hallucinations become visual. Obviously, I shouldn't be driving at this state. Once at the end of a knock-out, drag-out session working on a differential equations take-home exam, I saw a black cat in my dorm room that scurried, jumped on my bed, and then disappeared in the shadows. Even though I wasn't done with my exam, I closed my book shut off the light and went to bed.

    Surprisingly enough, I don't feel like taking a nap right now ;-)

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